Sweet Goodnight

What’s the sweetest thing?

It’s when I am hearing your appreciation. Whenever you’re telling me so many Thank Yous. Thank You for the food I cooked for you. Smallest thing like changing our bedsheet into a new one. Like adding up some extra pillows for you to have more comfortable sleeping time.

These are some of the sweetest small things that matters to me so much. Making my heart so full of love from you.

I can hear you sleeping soundly, don’t minding if this snores getting louder. I know that I love one of this things with you here by my side. I am so much pleased to served my love to you. To show you everything I can to take care of you.

So calm the night is.

Listening to our cutest radio from your father with our favorite radio station on. Really, music is also a therapy.

Thank You for some snaps your sharing with me. Quick pictures we’ve taken from my phone. Thank You!!! It’s like a simple things that creates biggest space in my heart. I know how much you are tired from work but you’re still making time for me in your sweetest way. Just as simple just like that.

I love you this much!!! Keep rocking my world. My kryptonite! My rock. My everything. With you is always a Valentine. Praying to God that no more penny quarrels. I don’t want any fighting either that would lead again to something I know I’ll be regretting. I don’t want that to happen. I am happy with what we have right now.

A month to go before our 4th Wedding Anniversary. Glad we’re making it together surpassing everything. We have gone this far.

Sweetest dreams, my love.

Dream of me.

My Favorite love story

What’s so good about being a stay at home wife?

Before getting married I was a career woman. Even after being married. I just stopped working because I needed to recover my health from getting sick badly last year. We decided that I must take a rest for a while. Then my husband wanted me to stay at home.

I never thought it was going to be this challenging. Doing all these things inside the house. We don’t have a kid yet, because they’re gone a little too soon. So now, we are currently living just the two of us. Me playing the role of a wife. I salute all the women out there! Wives.. You are all quite beautiful the way you are handling everything. Now that I have so much time, I must say that I learned a lot how to become a great wife. What a great wife I should be for my husband. It takes a lot to maturity. You know, these kind of things we us girls need to do after being married.

Husband is like an eldest son to take good care everyday. Waking up early in the morning to prepare for his breakfast and as well as his dinner.

Taking too much time learning every household chores to do them on my own especially that we are living separately. I am just lucky enough his parents bought us a house. Sometimes it’s too exhausting that that I wanted to go out for a me time.

I am still on the process of accepting the drastic changes in my life from being a career woman into a plain housewife. I need to love being a wife. Because this is my fate.

Having too much time sometimes making me feel so bored of my life. Feeling like there is no progress happening. It feels like being stagnant.

Time is passing by each day that the only thing I did was to breathe. I missed those days where I used to be in my corporate world. For now, I am learning how to become more submissive to him. To lower down my ego and not to stay dominant as I am like I was before.

There are so much to learn about being a wife. I salute my mom! Because we are six siblings!

I thought that maybe God taken away our kids because I needed to learn all these things first. I should learn to become more understanding and have more patience in everything. It takes time to grow and to be more matured. Learning is always an everyday process.

He is the only one working now that’s why sometimes budgeting is really hard to adjust. Enough to sustain us. Thank God we are surviving.

There are times we get annoyed to petty things. If we are having a misunderstanding, we never put a dot to this marriage. No matter how hard it is to surpass from all these chaos, glad we are still holding on each other.

As I am figuring things out, I can see he is more appreciative to me when it comes to how I am better now and changing into a better wife. Maybe on his eyes I am more responsible now. I used to be an easy happy go lucky one. It took me year’s to finally digest that I am married now.

I was the one who insisted this marriage to level up our relationship yet I am the only one who gets drown easily. So thankful to God that I made the right choice to got married to him. In this lifetime we know how difficult it is to keep a long lasting happy marriage. That’s the reality.

I decided to change myself. God has given me a hard lessons for me to learned from. I needed to grow up for HIM to save our marriage. My daughters in heaven now, my two angel’s won’t be happy for sure whenever they’re seeing us their parents are fighting over and over again.

I needed to be more understanding, attentive wife and a chef to cook for his foods. Maybe these are the things my husband wanted me to be for so long since we got married.

Yes it’s hard to keep this marriage. But I couldn’t imagined what my life would be without him. For 11years of being together, seven years in a steady relationship and almost 4years of being married we we’re never perfect but we keep on deciding to stay together.

Our life as a couple is not a perfect one. Frenemies most of the times but I am so proud to have him by my side. I can’t let him go that easily. I learned how to refused of letting him go whenever life thrown a little challenges for us.

I have one of the best husband in the world!

He is a hard working guy! He is not a typical don romantico but he makes his own way of sweetness. I used to tell him I hate it when he is not that showy. I can see he is making some efforts to be on the sweet side of a husband.

I am loving him more now each day. I am learning to go further of getting to know his deeper side as well as a person. Finally I get to have so much time of looking deeply towards him.

I always pray to God everything about in our marriage. Whenever we lose control of every challenging circumstances along our way and it’s too difficult to endure.. I just keep on praying to God. That HE forever guide us to be in the center of our marriage.

We are moving forward with so much strength in our hearts for everything we’ve overcome as a couple. We are better now than we were before and more matured individuals I must say. Hoping and praying also that one day we’d become a family and have kids again.

Lost Self

Feeling a little too much heavy inside my heart again this Monday morning. I thought I bursted everything out. Still this feeling of emptiness inside. I don’t what to do with this kind of emotions. I dragged him down, too. I am upset. He gets mad. I am sad. He wasn’t comforted. Argh! It sucks.

Weekend was almost perfect and happy. But suddenly, just I asked him for something like if I am that really hard to love.. He said Yes! That the reason why we’re still together was because of me..because I stopped it from happening.

It was so long ago. That moment that we almost breaking up. I came by to him. Then here we are. Already married, and it is going four tragical years.

Is this #Depression?

I am really having a hard time figuring these things out on myself. Sometimes, I will just let it flow until I stopped.

There are days just like today. That I do not want to do anything. I started crying and feeling empty.

No one to comfort me. Even him. This feeling of being lost over and over again! I am trying to calm myself. This is the most unfortunate time that even I myself do not know how to myself even more. It sucks!

I wish there would be someone or anyone who can wipe my tears, for me. I keep failing to do the best for myself. He keeps on telling me maybe he is not the one that I needed now the most. We are trying to keep this marriage, we are on the rocks. I must fix myself first. I do not know where the hell is this going, this fucking life!

I am keeping it all by myself. Maybe he is also having a hard time to cope up with every sorrows deep inside him. Where are we going from here? From this darkness. We are so broken. Our lives have been shattered by the fact that we lost too much from what we had. Sorrows from still covering up all these pains throughout this time after they’re gone. They we’re gone! Our babies. This is our forever brokenness.

I am sick. I am still recovering from this illness. So that we can have another baby. Are we really going to have another one? We are so much lost! I can’t stand for so long now. I am a bit tired fighting this battle alone! I hate being alone. I hate what my life has become. Even my own shadow leaves me in darkness.

What to do? Sucks.

I keep on praying. I keep on crying. I am standing on this edge for so long. Waiting to be held by someone or afraid someone might throw me more to fall from this edge. I am fucking tired! I needed to do something. I needed to let this heavy heart to be unloaded. I am tired of loving that I am hardly recieving it in return. Maybe I am not just accepting I now at the bottom. I am now at my lowest point of my life. I am being frustrated. I feel like I am a liability. I am so lost. Can’t find my way back on track. I needed some break from all of this things! I need to recharge. I needed to cry to death! I am so nothing now.

I wanted to scream. Scared because I know nobody wants to hear it, either. I am the only one who will gets annoyed with my own voice. Hayst!

I don’t know where to start from fixing. No matter how hard I tried, I keep ending up being totally wounded but not founded. Feeling that I am so alone and have no one to rescue me in this fucking world!

What to do? Hopeless case. Do I need to have myself check by healthcare professional? Don’t have money. So expensive. I just needed someone to be there for me. I can’t even find one. Or I am just isolating myself? Not everyone will understand. They will just judge me. Judgemental world anyway! Almost there, quitting. Still hanging on but really near to the edge.

Am I hard really to be loved?

Was it really hard for them to love me?

Why am I so hard to love?

I am feeling lost. With those kind of answers I got from him.

He said, Yes!

I needed to forgive myself.

He said, I needed to be strong.

I am so strong for a longest time..

I am so lost!

Can somebody tell me is this happening? Hoping that my crying will help me to fill these things out. This heavy feeling! Argh.

How to turn your long term relationship with him into a marriage

What are some of the secrets to creating a long lasting relationship and turns it into marriage?

1)Know him so well
Focus on the little things that he usually does. Take time to learn and gets involved in his own world. Start from the basic things. Be serious in reading his actions. It’s important to read between the lines. Sometimes you might feel the he is so insensitive about you, in the end you’ll find out that what maybe he is doing is exactly what he knows that best for you. It will definitely takes time to really get to know your man. Always find a quality time together. You’ll discover a lot from each other that’s probably different from each of you. It’s like colliding two worlds from edge to egde.
{Time flies so fast.
For almost 11years of celebrating valentine’s day together, there are still so much to learn from this guy! My garyboy.
I have gotten into someone who’s not just merely a boy..but a real man eversince day one.
As time passes by, everyday is always an unfolding experiences of getting to know him deeply.}

2)Have an open COMMUNICATION
If your having this gut feeling already, start from being honest to him. Everything he needs to know, let him know the soonest possible. It’s best if upon starting your relationship you will be able to talk to anything under the sun like about that happened from your pasts. Either it was good or bad, tell him. You will be able to build trust in your relationship. Men are most likely much open minded compared to us girls the way they are percieving things or situations. They differ on their insights on a logical basis. Mostly dominant because of their ego.

3)If you think he is the right one, push through with it.
It doesn’t matter if you are just a woman, to do the first move to level up your relationship. Anyway, in a relationship it takes two tango. The longterm the relationship has been, the more boring and stagnant it gets. Don’t wait for him to make it happen. If there’s this urge to finally step it up to the next level, then go for it. On the long run, you girls probably having hints if he is not or he is the one. As getting to know stage have gone so far, in your heart you are finally decided. You guys starting to talk about wedding plans. If it’s not now, when will it be?! Take the risks. You’ll never know unless you do it now. Love will find a way. It doesn’t matter how luxurious you may think about the big day. It’s really something between expectations vs. reality! Hahah.
Of course girls, for us it’s normal to dream for our wedding day to be perfect and beautiful. Why not?! But, as maturity takes place, you will realize that what you should taking more effort is making your marriage more beautifully than your wedding day. This is practically speaking. Save money for future purposes, the life after your wedding. That’s the real thing to prepare for.

What to prepare before marriage?
-financially
-emotionally
-physically
-spiritually

Financially – there’s a huge difference between life living as a single into being married. You’ll be buying everything for two. You will be spending like buying your own house to live in together. Other expenses together like paying your own debts. -bills payments,groceries..and if ever you will be having kids on the future it is another responsibility.

Emotionally – this is not a boyfriend girlfriend relationship anymore. You will be creating a home and will be building your love nest on your own from scratch. Everything should be on your own, household chores (taking care of him, cleaning the house, preparing for his meals, laundry thing and everything. If you will a stay at home wife. Another challenge if you will become a career woman and wife and mother as well. I salute every moms and wives out there! There’s really more to prepare emotionally before getting married. You will learn not to be selfish and to do things for your only. The only thing guy will be having a second thought about you is he will be thinking if you will become a good wife and best mother to his kids in the future. Men usually prefer women who he thinks will be good enough to make for him a home to live for.

Physically – Executive checkup is best. It is a must to get to know also your health status especially if you are both planning to have kids. Staying healthy is something you need to plan for also. Health is wealth.

Spiritually – life during marriage is not a bed of roses. Challenges sometimes are really hard to surpass. Make sure not to give up on each other. And make God is in the center of your relationship. Pray as always as possible.

{On a complicated December love affair of 2008.
We took another step out of that simple hi and hello conversation. We never thought that one day we’d be together forever like this. Because we we’re just hanging out casually during my college days and he was just an acquaintance to me.
Until destiny find it’s way for us.
It just happened.}

4)Welcome each others family.
This is also the time that you are having family gatherings on both sides. Do something to get into your future inlaws. Have that sense of connections to his families and loved ones.

5)Acceptance is the key
To loving someone sincerely is accepting the whole thing about who that someone is. Personalities differ from the others. You are two different individuals who happens to be together. Compliment each other’s weaknesses. Don’t try to change him. Because, unfortunately he will not do it for you girl, no matter how much he loves you. Build respect and trust towards each other.
Respect everything. Give him enough space and privacy whenever he needs to. Respect his time that its not only for you but also to people around him that matters to him, like his family. Understand his kind of work. Don’t be too jealous if he is having a hard time managing his time. There’s a perfect quality time for everything. And don’t create the small issues into a big thing to start penny fighting and quarrels. It won’t lead to a better arguments. Stay calm. Be submissive. Men has their highest ego in them so learn to adjust and try not to be as dominant as he is. Love everything about him without trying to change him into a person that he is not.

It takes time to maturity.
It takes courage to grow old together.
Godspeed!

Post Valentine’s greetings to all of these beautiful humans!

Happy 4years old to this couple wedding rings we bought February 1, 2016 on exact day of our 7th year anniversary as boyfriend girlfriend. A month and few days before our actual Civil Wedding Ceremony. On both ring’s engraved our names.

{Gary-Matet}

Blogging creates more self love

As I keep on blogging since the day I started, my life started to become more meaningful. I get to wake up each day feeling more excited. My head keeps on spinning thinking what the best of me that I can share. I am becoming more selfless for analyzing myself what to give out to others who might be reading my every blog. This is making me a whole new me and giving me so much sense of purpose. In deeper aspects of getting to know more of myself, sharing what I had learned from my past experiences was really something making me into self improved version of my old self now. This is opening a new opportunities for me to my personal growth. Satisfying myself through this blogging experience that I can be more, than I was before. Reading a lot of stories and experiences from others is what making me wanting to do more, to strive hard more and to keep on doing this kind of thing – Blogging. Hoping that I had done this a little earlier when my world was still too dark to out in an open. Well anyways, it’s not yet too late to start from growing again from here. I am so glad that I can express more of myself through blogging. One day I can be a real writer and author on my own way. I am loving more now the way I am telling the world the best of what I am and what I can be in the future. There’s a lot to get an inspiration from. I am learning now to get outside from my own comfort zone. I keep on learning these days, while being addicted into something I really love doing. Suddenly through blogging I am becoming more proud of myself than the usual. This is what I’ve been wanting to do even before this blogging journey. This is my only world where I can’t hide of who I am from deep within. I learned to say whatever in my thoughts in a different way that keep nurturing the future writer in me. I am always excited of what I can write about each morning that I wake up. Thanks for this handy phone and few data – the only things now helping me creating a better new world for myself. This is sooo addicting, indeed! I can be in this one side of my hiding place in this house and will just keep on blogging whole day. Well of course there’s some household chores I still need to do because I am a plain housewife. No Yaya or what. We are not well off anyway. I can disregard my addiction with kdrama series as long as I will keep myself writing, blogging on my free times of the day. I used to maximize myself in trying to do best in this exploration of myself that I am good at. I knew that this is something really more of myself. Something I couldn’t stop myself from doing because this is what I really love. I started to really feel being grateful to everything I have now in my life. I started to forgive myself. And others as well, too. It’s really true that it must comesĀ  first from you. Because positivity of my perspectives in life now radiates to people around me. Especially to my husband. Lessen the petty quarrels that sometimes leading to almost losing our marriage. This is making me happy inside. My solitude. Maybe I was born for this. Not noticing on my younger years during highschool days when I started doing poems, that is what life means to me. That this is my life – writing. I stopped writing and making poems for a while when I entered college. I have been distracted from what I always wanted to do. College life was full of extreme memories. Peers. Lovelife. Happy go lucky young adult. Sedentary lifestyle while pursuing to finish my nursing school. Luckily I passed and finished but I never had the chance to took my board exam. I am afraid of failures. Thinking throughout this time that I am a failure. My life, me and even now my marriage. My loss from my two daughters who passed away at their young age. My marriage felt on the rock’s recently. I forget how to get up on my own. After my hospitalization last year 2019, everything becomes chaos. I don’t know why and how I did it. I’ve come a long way now. More realization, more self reflection, more self love more self awareness and I tried to change for the better. Maturity or adulting 101 as they says not happening overnight. It took years. It took many pains, heartaches, failures, sufferings and sorrows. Betrayals to be included in the list. Soo many painful things that makes me a human robot. Then there comes getting to know – Blogging. This changes a whole lot in me. Few days of blogging since day one are creating drastic beautiful changes in me now.

I can really smile and feeling genuinely happy about doing this. I can stay focus and do nothing but only this. Looking forward to create a wonderful life ahead of this journey that I am finally embracing in with so much joy in my heart. I am thanking God for letting me have this kind of talent. Not everyone can write. Not everyone have this kind of talent and passion through writing. This is my new found craft. I will begin doing this with my full heart of determination each day and will keep myself enhancing my ability to write. I know that my passion will be leading me to a better opportunities and luck in the near future. I will keep moving forward and do good to give my best that I can be in this battlefield. No more drama’s. No more negative thinking. I will keep diverting every bad experiences into something that’s really good vibrations. I will act to push through to my dreams come true and becomes reality. Because now, it is starting to be fulfilled little by little each day.

I am being grateful to God for guiding me and letting me experience this kind of self achievement for finally letting me do what I really love. My only limitations before was really myself. My mind. This is something what I am doing now, that my past and future self will be proud of me.

At this time, I am delighted of the thought of not giving up on chasing my dreams that will really making me someday a gold mine in my own self. Still in a humble beginnings that I get more of my inspiration from to keep going to never gets tired of believing in myself that I can do this. God is always with me along the way.

Happy Blogging, Bloggers!

Once in my life, I gained self confidence to do what I thought I couldn’t. I’ll get inspiration from this photo. Facing my own fears. Accepting and embracing lovingly all the challenges that might come along my journey as new blogger.

Hi there.
I’m MathereinKay but you can call me Matet to make it easier for you.
I’m a full time house wife.
A newbie blogger.
Former Medical Repsentative and worked for a Pharmaceutical Company in Sales Department which focuses on selling our products.
I used to be in a Sales and Promotion.
A graduate on a degree of Bachelor’s of Science Nursing.

Like my Fb Page
Empowered Wife
Follow me
IG – @mathereinkay
TWITTER – @matherein.

I can write for you message me on my email matetkay26@gmail.com

How to evaluate removing Toxic people to creates more #SelfLove #SelfRespect #SelfEvaluation

Questions that might help you evaluating how to remove toxic people from your life.

1)What was your worst painful heartbreaking betrayal you had experienced?
-First you need to recognized what were the reasons behind that’s causing you so much pain. If you want to jot it down, go for it. What did they have done to you? List them. That will help you to be able to process it well. It will surely be beneficial for your own good.

2)Was your betrayals came from the people who you used to befriended with?
Someone in the family?
-To finally recognized them if who are your stressors of your brokenness, there you will start to find ways what to do with them.

3)What ways are you going to do to with those people?
-Keep in mind what ways you are going to do to minimize encounters with them.
-if you needed to unfollow, go ahead.
-if you needed to unfriend on any social media do it.
-If they are from your office work, this is something whichever way is somewhat a major decision. To stay, you’ll be needing too much effort not to become swayed of their presence every now and then whenever you’re at workplace. To resigned, there are disadvantages and advantages of course. Through resigning you’ll be minimizing encounters with them or maybe you can definitely cut them out of your life on an instant without having completely no communications at all. You’ll feel peace of mind afterwards, to finally free yourself from toxic environment which is no longer helpful to your mental health. On the other hand you’ll be leaving your corporate world and will probably change your lifestyle unless you find another good company to apply. That will help to sustain to earn for a living.
-Avoiding them is not necessarily mean you are anti-social but, you are just being selectively social. There’s a difference.
-Not to be with them totally, but it will become a little bit difficult for you if they are your in-laws who’s somehow belittle you at some point. Lucky you are if you are living with your husband on your own house. It will gets easier to distance yourself from them. For times like special occasions that you have no other choice but to take the situation, try to act civil as you can be. A little sacrifice on your part fot the sake of your partner. Anyway they’re still his/her family. Practice a well mannered behavior for any family gatherings setting aside first any personal issues. It Will lessen certain arguments from you and your partner.

4)What’s one of the most important thing to do?
Forgive yourself first, that way you’ll start healing and eventually one day you’ll be waking up that it won’t hurting you anymore. It will takes time, but keep on praying for an enlightenment of your heart. Love more. Trust less. Do more, expect less. Live more. Laugh more.

Then make an evaluation of what you have learned from those experiences. Take note for all your learnings from those situations. Keep praying to God to remove all your grudges inside your heart. Prayers do help a lot.
Loving yourself more and focusing to do what’s best for your healing process is not being selfishness, it’s more of self love and self respect. Anyway who will be the one to making it for you, if not you yourself alone.
It’s alright to lose toxic people from your life who are no longer helping your personal growth. It’s okay to lose them as long you keep from losing your own self. What matters is, YOU.

Hi there.
I’m MathereinKay but you can call me Matet to make it easier for you.
I’m a full time house wife.
A newbie blogger.
Former Medical Repsentative and worked for a Pharmaceutical Company in Sales Department which focuses on selling our products.
I used to be in a Sales and Promotion.
A graduate on a degree of Bachelor’s of Science Nursing.

Like my Fb Page
Empowered Wife
Follow me
IG – @mathereinkay
TWITTER – @matherein

I can write for you email me matetkay26@gmail.com

Blog to Boost Mental Health

What are your reasons for blogging?

I am a few days old blogger and really enjoying this one. Since day one I learned so much from all of these things a new beginner should know about being a blogger.

BLOGGING. It changes my life from a dull plain housewife into a something that given me so much reasons to be excited about waking up each day. I found platform like this that will showcase my every emotional struggles and turned into a good one inspiration to others that might be helpful to some who are having same experiences like me. I came from a many depressive situations for this past few years. It’s not always in time that we will have someone to talk for everything we truly feel inside. Everyone is so busy for making a living. This is my one way of coping to all of those painful sufferings I’ve endured from the past. I am so grateful that I am making myself from scratch into someone my present self will be thankful for my future self. I wish I have done this a little earlier when the most heavy times of my life happened. Well, I am still happy sharing my deep thoughts in a different way now because of blogging. I love to write. Many friends have been telling me before that why I don’t start doing like this. It took me a while to figured these things out that this is what I am good about myself. This is what makes me realize that is me. This is more of what I am and who I really wanna be someday. I have plenty of my collections of poems I made myself. So, before I start blogging I am poetrist on my little own ways as well. I made them from the deepest heartaches till up to the most feeling cloud nine moment’s. I am feeling so great to finally realized that this is what I love doing. This is me!

I am one of those individuals who suffered from almost losing myself along the way throughout the process of healing emotionally from all of the chaos that happened in my life. Thank God for this BLOGGING journey that now I am taking in. It gets to lessen the petty things we fight about with my husband. It boost my self confidence to give out the best of what I have in me. Because there is so much more in me that I might give in. I do have reasons now to continually going on with my life with full of satisfaction with what I am doing. This is my passion! I am choosing now to do what I really love doing the most. -Because life is what we make it! – this is my highschool life like kind of motto for myself. The power to create the best version of YOURSELF lies within YOU. Before trying to impress others you must first try to impress your inner you and make believe that you are great enough to keep going.

Don’t give in to keep falling behind just because of all the misfortunes. I lost my two daughters in this early year of my married life. Yes, we have them with us for a short period of time. My eldest was 5months when she died, my second little one was 2months. Think about all worst case scenarios in your imagination, after losing our two daughters our marriage becomes on the rocks. I get hospitalized recently, luckily I am still alive. But now, after all we’ve been through as a married couple for 4years we are still together. Depression? Yeah! We’re almost there, me and my husband. Our love for each other is so much greater over the pains and sufferings. We are stronger than before. We are still striving to become our marriage a success one until the end. We are working on of having a healthy pregnancy as well to avoid losing another precious one in the future.

Thankful for this Blogging journey I have something to work on for myself. If you may asked, Yes! If this blogging experience is money for most of the bloggers out there. For me this is a life changing platform that helps a lot for my mental health. Being healthy is not just merely the absence of any illness or any disease. A healthy well being also includes that you are healthy mentally as well to go on with your life after all those shattered and broken pieces within. It might took years to process everything but just keep on going. Crying is also a helpful way to ease everything. The most to be thankful for?

MY GOD. When I lost everything and I became nothing, there HE is. My comfort to all my shortcomings, to my deepest sorrows, to my silent cries, to the most painful judgement and discrimnation from others that makes me feel so small..HE lifted me up! My bible verses are gift words from HIM. I did not stop from being broken. He uses every instruments to kee me going on whenever I couldn’t find anymore strengths to fight my own battles. I depended on HIM.

I keep on praying hard everyday. I never get tired of praying. Maybe I will tired of living my life again and to get back on track, but I will never ever leave a day without praying unto him. Because without GOD..I am nothing. Maybe I lost everything..my daughters, my previous job because I got badly sick and needed to stop to prioritized my health first, my few friends that I intentionally stop being freinds with because I don’t want anyone in my life now that creates noise just because I am at the lowest point in my life. I am nothing now, but with God.. I am completely a new one revised better version of who I am.

I am standing firm beautifully with my own scars from the past that molded me as a more strengthened human with a better understanding deeper of what my life is all about. I am more fiercer than ever, with a heart of steel. A warrior in me made me more of an empowered wife just like my website’s name.

Training my mind to see all the good things about me now. And one way is BLOGGING TO BOOST MY MENTAL HEALTH.

Thank You Bloggers, Writers and maybe Authors. Thank you so much for taking time to read! Fighting!!!

My everything most of the times whenever I am feeling alone and has no one to talk to. My pen and a notebook will do.

Hi there.
I’m MathereinKay but you can call me Matet to make it easier for you.
I’m a full time house wife.
A newbie blogger.
Former Medical Repsentative and worked for a Pharmaceutical Company in Sales Department which focuses on selling our products.
I used to be in a Sales and Promotion.
A graduate on a degree of Bachelor’s of Science Nursing.

Email : matetkay26@gmail.com

How to create a unique blogger #SelfAchievement #BeYou

What is in you that others don’t have? Many great bloggers and authors out there aside from you.

Everyone started from scratch. Be mindful to your own little success stories in everyday blogging life.

Tips to be your own unique version of a blogger

1) Start Blogging – Blogging is one way of expressing your own life’s experiences. Your life path is definitely a journey that only YOU had travelled. Have a voice that is different from the other’s. Be your own unique version of a great blogger and future writer. Keep blogging.

2) Read and Learn – Research everything you wanted to learn. You will get some free blogs to read on especially if you don’t have enough budget yet to enroll to any short courses. Be grateful for many great bloggers and writers for being generous to share their own learnings. Keep on learning from them, get all the tips and guides but never be like them. Find within you what are the things you are good at and start focusing there. Remember you are one of a kind great blogger! Put up the best in you. Think about how you can share the uniqueness in you as a blogger that others don’t have. Be your own you. It’s important to blog a unique approach to show your reader. They must read something different from you. Again, focus on your self achievement.

3) Boost your niche – As you started your journey as a blogger, each day you’ll get to discover what’s best niche that fits to your personality. It is very important to find a great niche on your own that you give your best shot as a beginner. It’s okay to find it hard from the start, there’s no easy way to success. Take one step at a time. Slowly but absorbed everything smartly and digest everything one by one. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Tap your shoulder for every job well done. Focus on your best interest whatever it may be. Start from there and keep on blogging. Sometimes you will feel tired and frustrated but keeps on going. If you really love what you are doing, your heart will lead you to the right path. Don’t forget to PRAY FOR IT! God will guide you along the way.

4) Small Achievements matters – Of course it really do matters! Who will be the one to uplift yourself? YOU. So always be aware of every smallest achievements you’ll have in a day, week, months or years. Keep on tracking your own success stories up way there to achieving your dreams. Your stats says a lot. Keep on taking inspiration from your stats. Monitor it and focus on what you’re noticing best viewed. Start from creating a great content. Increasing slowly your traffic is still a traffic itself. Be happy and feels good to every achievements even the smallest one, you will start from there upward. Tap your back for a job well done!

5) Compete only with yourself – there’s a huge wide competition in this journey of blogging. The importance of creating the best of a blogger on your own version is a must. Do not compare yourself to anyone you look up to. They have been there on top for ahead of times of you. You are just starting now. Be happy for your own achievements since day one up to the present or wherever you are on your blogging career. If you don’t have a client yet, just be happy and contented with it. If it’s for you, who knows one day it will landed on your inbox email. Take time to reset your mind, if you’re feeling exhausted don’t be too harsh. There’s no running competition within you from what you are achieving each day. Feel the greatness of unique talent that you have. Savour it and norture yourself for a dreams you are praying for. In the right it will come for you. God will give it to you! Just keep on believing yourself that you can do it with all your heart. With right attitude you can achieve it! Stay focus. Keep blogging.

BE YOUR OWN VERSION. Find ways on creating a unique content you can share to others. Believe that your way of blogging is different from them!

Hi there.
I’m MathereinKay but you can call me Matet to make it easier for you.
I’m a full time house wife.
A newbie blogger.
Former Medical Repsentative and worked for a Pharmaceutical Company in Sales Department which focuses on selling our products.
I used to be in a Sales and Promotion.
A graduate on a degree of Bachelor’s of Science Nursing.

For inquiries email me at matetkay26@gmail.com

How to become Self Aware to avoid #Depression

How often do you check yourself or evaluate your behavior?

We don’t notice that everything really depends on how we perceive to what’s really going on around us. The way you get hurt mostly comes from the way you behave to certain stimuli or cause.

5 ways that will help you to become self aware

1)Keeping a journal – it is a must to keep a daily record of your daily living. This is one way of putting altogether everything about of who you are and what’s keeping you on with your life. List down everything that’s making you feel upset, process it and pray for it to overcome. In that way it will be easier for you to filter what to avoid or not. It will make you help understand yourself more and have deeper realization to whats going on inside of you.

2)A real friendsomeone so close enough to tell you right to your face who you really are as a person without any hesitation. Remember not everyone around we usually hang out with are real ones. Some are just fancy and fake people waiting for us to get down.

3)Talk to your parents – these are some of your valued loved ones in your lives that absolutely can tell you about of who you are. Most of the young adults nowadays don’t have much time to even set a day for a visit to their parents. When was the list time you visited them? Best life’s advice you’ll usually get are from them. Try to listen. They are probably not a perfect parents, definitely there’s no such perfect one but if you will allow to open up your heart to listen, it will somehow lead you to a better life someday.

4)Siblings Conversation – Lucky are those who belongs to a one big happy family. In this kind of home and atmosphere is wherein you’ll probably hear the most realistic advices on a most caring and drastic way at the same time about of who you are. All your mess in life will be brought out even up to the most deepest secrets you don’t want them to know. They are some of few individuals who will care you the most sincerest way no matter of who you are as a person. They will not leave you in pieces, they will help you get through some hardships in life as long as they can. Treasure them.

5)Partners in life – someone special who knows your strengths and weaknesses as an individual. The one who doesn’t tolerate if he/sees something wrong in your doing. Who lifts you up when you are so much feeling down in this world.

Don’t make it too hard on yourself. It’s a long way process to getting rid of every reason why you are behaving negatively. Focus on loving more of yourself. Do whatever makes you completely happy. Always necessary to take good care of your well being. Not just on physical aspect, but mostly to your mental health being. Make it yourself a better version of who you are as a person. Ask and seek help from God. He is the only ONE who will strengthens you. Have deep connections with HIM. Do not ever give up. Remember all the things that will make you a great one, focus on that. Eventually, everything will turn out right. Believe in yourself. Because God make a beautiful creation through you..to make a difference in this world. You are an interesting person! Everyone is unique and each of us has different story to tell. Make yours a worth one, to read.

Hi there.
I’m MathereinKay but you can call me Matet to make it easier for you.
I’m a full time house wife.
A newbie blogger.
Former Medical Repsentative and worked for a Pharmaceutical Company in Sales Department which focuses on selling our products.
I used to be in a Sales and Promotion.
A graduate on a degree of Bachelor’s of Science Nursing.

Like my Fb Page
Empowered Wife
Follow me
IG – @mathereinkay
TWITTER – @matherein

WAKE UP SLEEPYHEAD SOUL

In my most quiet times when I am alone all by myself.. There’s so many anxieties been bugging on my mind that are not so useful. Whenever the smallest noise I am hearing makes me think of something. To stop this unstoppable negative thingsĀ  in my head I end up with this. For some reasons I need to put everything into words. I need to do something to keep out whatever is been bothering inside me for nothing at all. For no specific cause deep down, I just need to lessen the thoughts. I know somehow this will do helps a lot. Even if I am wondering what the hell is happening in my arm, it’s feeling numb or what. Maybe for blogging on my phone over few days ago for many times in a day. I just need to put this out on my mind throughout this.
It’s hard to stay lying in bed after my husband’s left for work. Whenever I’m left alone, even being alone is something I perceived as fearful scenario. Later on of every Monday morning, my sister will be her always coming to our home of my husband. It is to be with us especially for me to have someone to be with me on a regular weekdays that my husband usually spend most of his time working. Every weekend she’s going home to my parents place. Maybe she’s giving us some private and quality time to spend together since every Saturday and Sunday are days my hubby is off from work.
Whenever husband left for work every Monday morning, I can’t go back to sleep anymore thinking that I am alone in this bed.
He is my comfort measure. My comfort zone, that whenever he’s on my side I feel so secure. I need to wake up. To come out of this bed sooner, to divert any unnecessary things to feel to sink in my head. I need to wake up, for myself. To do everything I need to do as a wife in here. Many dishes to wash. Our clothes after i’ts been hanged up dry. Everything just to make myself busy, to forget that I am alone along with any fear and anxieties I don’t know where are the hell coming from. I need to stop this laziness because of waking up early I’m a little sleepyhead. So hard to keep my eyes shut this kind of morning I am not so busy physically without him by my side.
I need to do something to make me feel good about this morning. About focusing on what’s happening why my arm is feeling so dumb numb. I guess, this has something to do with my previous self being badly sick lastyear of this month also. Last year 2019 was one of the most challenging year for me. I feel my body giving up, I know there was something really bad going on inside. The fear of losing my life and not finding myself back again into everything I used to do.

The fear of Death. The fear of dying. I am so still young thinking that I need to fight for my life. Sometimes I wondering myself why there’s nothing good happening in my life since I got married. Chaos is definitely is the perfect definition if I will to described it in one word. Year 2016 I got married, it was also the same year i found out I am pregnant with my first little one. Still working while carrying on her with me until I gave birth January5 2017. For a few months that our lives as a family was almost perfect and simply happy. Then suddenly came up this devastating situation wherein she’s been badly not doing good anymore. We we’re having a hard time feeding her for a couple of days prior the day that we finally rushed her to the hospital, my first born MaGee. We just thought she’s having trouble with the milk formula. We switched many times for different formulas prescribed by our pediatric doctor trying to fed her. Still, not feeding properly until we decided to really rush her unto the nearest hospital because she’s darkening colors outside of her body. There, Pneumonia. Luckily the doctor who was the one who first assisted us was a Pulmonologist. After of 24days, struggling and battling for her life to be saved in the hospital specifically inside the ICU..the worst nightmare came out..We lost our first bundle of joy. It was a hard fight. But our MaGee had given us the best fight hard. It’s been so long she fought it so hard in pain, all those painful things done to her during her hospitalization. That was one of the worst pain. As I am making this, it still tears me out. Lord, unrecognizing it’s still painful inside. Every details are so fresh that I only thought I finally moved on losing her. I am still crying out over this painful loss. Few months after we crimated her, and buried her in our hometown province of Leyte Philippines, Some good news again I am pregnant with my second one. A daughter again that I’ve given birth last July17 2018, my MaVee. Again, same scenario. Same reasons of confinement. But a short period of time of hospitalization. Pneumonia again. After 5days of battling again in the hospital, we lost again her. My second loss, to my second daughter. What’s worst were even if was only a quick time that God allowed us to became their parents, still the short period of time that we collected special moments with them are tearing us apart inside until now w. I hardly cried that time that it was over. I don’t know why. Even everyone around are crying out loud. Especially my husband, he really loves so much our daughters! He adores them. It was so painful. It was a bad scene in my whole lifetime. Would you even imagined the pains of criminating your own little ones for twice? Two consecutive years. June10 2017 we lost my first one. October5 was my second girl. My angels our now not any longer with us. I thought I am fine and almost going on with my life. I never known this would still be, as painful as it is now while making this blog. Lastyear 2019 I am the one who suffered from Pneumonia. Again, that fear that my husband might be losing again someone in his life. Maybe that was the reason why I make it up until today sharing this to whoever might be reading this. God did not allowed me yet to leave this lifetime because there’s a husband who will be needing me to cope up from all those losses. To cope up for every chaos happened in our lives. He is crying even up to now every night that he keeps on talking our litte ones before he goes to sleep. For the twice of the pains and losses we experienced, I never shown to him my own crying moments, I tried to hide it. That was the time he was getting his strength from me. He did it, slowly moving on and continually going on and on without me knowing that he’s fighting his own battle for thoughts of quitting like suicidal attempts along the way. But there I was, I became the reason for him that he finds courage to push through living a painful life and always thinking about our lost daughters. It tears me out like hell now. This is the only a few moments like now that I am letting myself out for all these painful sorrows inside of me. I miss them so much! So much, sometimes that maybe we can spend the whole day crying out our burst of deep pains losing them. Many weekends and many penny fights as a married couple that almost ended up like we were about to lose each other, to lose this marriage and finally given up on us. There were many day’s that we are not entitled to any small misunderstandings because we were both tired of everything for fighting. We are really fighting hard to keep our marriage, so difficult along the whole process of acceptance to what really happened to our daughters. For me, as I am always reflecting and having realization I keep telling myself that I need to stop all my fears, anxieties and Depression. I need to wake up. I need to move on and to stand firm after all we’ve been through throughout our married life. You see, we are about to celebrate our 4th year this year March 16th of 2020, but it seems like we’re having a lifetime of challenges to overcome. Hardships every year. Different losses. The worst part is us starting to lose ourselves during the process. I constantly hang up and holding on to this marriage that someday God will fulfill and complete us as a family.
I have never given up, though I sometimes do. I will just keep thinking about them because my kids did really saved me. Maybe they we’re gone to sacrificed for my husband and I to keep staying together as one.

God has His reasons. At first I kept asking him, but later on I continually moving on and moving forward without questioning HIM anymore why it all happened to us on our early marriage. There’s so much pain for almost 4years of married life. We are stronger now as a couple. And I know parting ways apart is never a solution to ease all the pains. It won’t fix anything like mending our broken hearts. We must stay together, because my babies fought it so hard for us. They have sacrificed for me, to saved me for me to be with their father for a lifetime. We are working on a healthier way to bear a child again now. It’s important to keep yourself as a healthy one. Look and love yourself and start taking care more, don’t wait for a time to come that it’s too late for you to take care of your well being. Health is wealth. No matter how successful you are in your career, once you get badly sick, everything you’ve been working hard for so long will be shattered in just one moment that it will be gone immediately. Treasure everything. Give back all the love and do not stop creating a good better you. It will starts from within. WAKE UP! Sun won’t stop rising in the morning. I am thankful and grateful God made an extension of my life. I am learning now that being a wife is somewhat really a challenging path also to take on. Maybe God is preparing me first. Before I become a mother again, GOD wants me to become the best wife I can be to my husband. Anyway I am a wife before I became a mother to my MaGee and MaVee. Salute to all the wives and mommies out there. God is my strength. He is my rock. Eventhough I am nothing now, I figured it out that I don’t need anything in this world to make feel we feel that I am whole again.. God is enough, HE completed me. I am building myself in the presence of HIM and more intimate bond with HIM. Always grateful that HE keeps waking me up each day. Continually blessing me despite of what happened. He turned all the disasters into a blessings in my life. I come out stronger now than I used to be, stronger than I was before. I am making the better version of who I am, the most strengthened one. Thank God!

My pretty adorable daughters! My angel’s in heaven.

Hi there.
I’m MathereinKay but you can call me Matet to make it easier for you.
I’m a full time house wife.
A newbie blogger.
Former Medical Repsentative and worked for a Pharmaceutical Company in Sales Department which focuses on selling our products.
I used to be in a Sales and Promotion.
A graduate on a degree of Bachelor’s of Science Nursing.

Like my Fb Page
Empowered Wife
Follow me
IG – @mathereinkay
TWITTER – @matherein

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